Monday, August 4, 2008

I really like this quote that my dad shared with me,
“… the tests of life are tailored for our own best interests, and all will face the burdens best suited to their own mortal experience. In the end we will realize that God is merciful as well as just and that all the rules are fair. We can be reassured that our challenges will be the ones we needed, and conquering them will bring blessings we could have received in no other way.

If we constantly focus only on the stones in our mortal path, we will almost surely miss the beautiful flower or cool stream provided by the loving Father who outlined our journey. Each day can bring more joy than sorrow when our mortal and spiritual eyes are open to God’s goodness. Joy in the gospel is not something that begins only in the next life. It is our privilege now, this very day. We must never allow our burdens to obscure our blessings. There will always be more blessings than burdens—even if some days it doesn’t seem so. Jesus said, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” Enjoy those blessings right now. They are yours and always will be.”

What a great reminder to me on my ‘down’ days to look around and smell the roses. One thing that I’ve come to realize in this short time is that we all have experiences in our lives that test us, some seem greater to those on the outside, but to the person in the midst of it all it’s a struggle/big deal. We have to remember this as we look on others during these difficult times and try our best not to judge their course of action or attitude etc because really they are probably trying their very best.

There really isn’t much reporting or updating to do, but it’s very early in the morning and I’ve thrown in the towel on trying to stay asleep in bed for the night. Blogging seemed like something I could do to pass the time. Any closet insomniacs who have some good advice for staying asleep without using drugs?

I don’t think I’ve adequately thanked Justin for all that he does for me. Not but 5 minutes ago I was crouched over the toilet, trying my best not to wake him up, but he came running in with a bottle of water for me just woken from his deep sleep. He’s also got a special way about him of kicking me in the pants to keep my attitude on track when it starts to veer one way or the other through this experience. I guess this is one of the many positive things that spouses are good for. : ) I can’t imagine how different of an experience I’d be having if this diagnosis had come about 7 months earlier. Happy 7 month anniversary to us!!

In the last post I wrote about trying to get into Mayo Scottsdale. Well we had our appointment with the oncologist, who seemed very good. However after a little more exploration we have decided not to pursue treatment there because our insurances are not accepted. So we will most likely use another oncologist here in the valley to administer the chemo regiment that was outlined for me at Mayo Rochester. And from there we will just play it by ear to see what will happen with surgery, follow up visits to Mayo etc. I have an appointment with a highly recommended oncologist here on Tuesday, and we hope to resume my next chemo cycle starting Wednesday.

As always, thank you all for your support and prayers!


Sara said...

Susan, I love the quote your dad gave you. You are in my prayers and I am so impressed with your strength and positive outlook!

laura said...

Love the quote! I think we all need that reminder, even in our everyday minor struggles! You guys are such a cute couple. Happy 7 months!

Brooke Colvin said...

Susan, I have so much enjoyed reading your blog over the last few weeks. I may not have known you very well personally, but through reading your posts and the comments of your friends and family, I have been able to see the strong and positive person you are and the example you are to so many others. Having not gone through anything like you are going through, I can honestly say that I do not know how I would react or feel in your situation. Your positive attitude and outlook is truly inspiring. I too appreciated that quote - we all need to be reminded of the blessings in our lives. You have been in our thoughts and prayers since we heard the news from Zach and Heather. Thank you again for sharing your progress and feelings on your blog. You are such an amazing person.

hlmortensen said...

You are such a great person Suz! Seriously! We all love ya!
Heidi :)

Justin, we love you too! We're thinking and praying for you too!


hlmortensen said...

One more thing...round one of chemo done...and the winner by far................................SUSAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Way to go girl!
Heidi :)

Kristin Hamblin said...

That quote is amazing. Thanks for sharing. Your wedding picture is beautiful. Reading your comments about Justin got me all teary-eyed. What a great guy! You are so lucky to have him by your side through all of this. You are always in our prayers.

Brenton and Adree Jensen said...


I had no idea! my prayers are with you and i know that you'll do great... you are one strong woman! Keep up the great work and keep in touch! You are amazing!


Bonnie said...

Thanks for sharing your journey with us, you are truly giving a gift of yourself as you blog. Your picture is beautiful and the quote says it all. Although we have only recently met, you are on my heart often, and I send prayers and supportive thoughts to you and Justin both... it is hard to see the person you love hurting...Keep on truckin on!

Andréa Morrow said...

Justin has done a wonderful job it seems..props to him, especially waking up at night! when Brant's asleep I could scream and he wouldn't hear :)he's just a deep sleeper.seriously though, thank goodness for husbands who love us and take care of us when we need them!

jaime said...

hi susan,

you don't know me, but my dad (who is justin's former bishop) sent me the link to your blog. i've also known justin since 7th grade, so i hope you're not creeped out by my looking at it.

i just wanted to thank you for your willingness to share your story. just by reading your posts, i can see that you are a brave and optimistic woman who is putting her trust in the Lord.

you are truly inspiring. i hope you don't mind if i check back every once in a while to see how things are going...

please know you and justin are in my thoughts. may the lord bless you to feel His love and strength through this difficult time.